journal day 1

Sometimes I really hate being at my job. It isn't the job per say but insurance isn't in my blood. I like it, people need it but sales is out of my comfort zone. But that'd not what I hate. What I hate is the high-school attitude of some in the office and sure maybe I'm toooo millennial or whatever the argument is, but I like to think of it as laid back and wanting to have fun throughout the day instead of just being a stiff, fun hater. I get my work done and enjoy my day. Not smiling and grumbling about what others are doing when you are just sitting around makes NO SENSE to me. I get others have a battle that we don't always see and I continue to remind myself that on an hourly basis it feels like but there is only so much I can hold back without feeling like exploding. The environment is awkward and uncomfortable and I hate that. I could keep doing this job if I worked from home. The environment is much less walking on egg shells when I am alone at home. Just frustrated I want to give grace but I feel like there is none in return. But then I'm the mean one because I don't extend the grace. Where is my grace? Ahhhh. Maybe running away will help.